I Hosted a Holiday Party in My PJs & Everyone Went Home Early

...and it was probably one of my favorite holiday parties to date! 

In a world where the holidays often come wrapped in more — more spending, more sparkle, more pressure to keep up with trends — December can feel like… a lot. Work parties. Family expectations. Travel logistics. Gift lists. Elf-on-the-shelf chaos.

So when it comes to time with friends, what if your holiday get-together felt less like another obligation on the calendar — and more like a deep exhale?

At JoyBuilt Events, even for personal gatherings, we come back to the same belief: Less noise. More meaning.

Here’s how to host a holiday get-together with friends that’s simple, cozy, and genuinely connecting.

1. Start With a Vibe, Not a Theme

Instead of stressing over the perfect holiday theme, choose a vibe.

Our vibe for this gathering was Cookies & Comfies. Other easy, low-pressure options:

• Soft pants & sparkly drinks

• Board games & comfort food

• Candlelight & cozy conversations

Let the vibe guide everything else — what people wear, what you serve, what you do. It instantly lowers expectations and quietly says: we’re here to relax and be real.

2. Make It a Shared Effort

You do not have to carry the whole event on your shoulders.

For this gathering, I chose to make the cookies and set up the table because I had the time and genuinely enjoy it. I grabbed a $14.99 magnum bottle of sparkling wine from Trader Joe’s — but that was it. No elaborate appetizers. No catering.

Once everyone arrived, we decided on takeout together, ordered via DoorDash, and people Venmo’d me their portion.

Other ways to keep it shared and simple:

• Invite guests to bring something potluck-style if they want to

• Use a pre-made playlist at low volume — present, not overpowering

• Skip the signature cocktail; offer a few bottled or canned options instead

Pro tip: store-bought + thoughtfully arranged still counts as love.

You’re not hosting for your friends — you’re hosting with your friends. Big difference.

3. Build in One Small Ritual (not based on spending money)

Rituals are what turn gatherings from random into remembered.

This year, ours was cookie decorating. Everyone got a box, a few sprinkle containers, and different frosting colors. No fancy instructions — just messy, nostalgic fun.

Other simple, meaningful ritual ideas:

• A gratitude round: “One good thing from this year”

• Intentions cards: one word or hope for the year ahead

• A shared activity like puzzles, ornament decorating, or board games

It doesn’t need to be heavy — just intentional enough to anchor the night.

4. Create Space for Real Conversations

Not every minute needs to be filled.

Leave some white space. Set up cozy corners with blankets and soft lighting. If it feels right, add a few conversation starters in a bowl:

• What’s something you’re proud of from this year?

• What’s a small joy you want more of next year?

You don’t have to perform for your people. You just have to be with them.

5. Set Expectations

A short text goes a long way.

Here’s the message I sent the day before:

“Good morning my friends! For those planning to come tomorrow, I wanted to reiterate that there’s no pressure to dress up or down or show up in any certain way. I know these weeks can be chaotic and stressful, so my hope is that this feels like a breather — no timetable, no pressure. Just come be cozy, hang out with cookies and Christmas music and good people 💗 And of course, if anything comes up and you’re not able to make it, no stress at all. I’ll try to drop some cookies off later in the week 🥰”

Helpful invite & reminder guidelines because clarity creates calm:

• Share date, time, and location early — and remind the day of
• Provide parking or building instructions if needed
• Frame it as an open house so people can come when it works for them
• Explicitly give permission to decline, even last minute

• Set the tone that guests can show up exactly as they are — festive or depleted
  
  

6. Make Cleanup Easy 

Cleanup is… not my favorite so small intentional choices = big relief.

I’m usually a pre-event chaos tornado with random doom piles hidden in closets. But this time, I cleaned ahead of time and planned for easy cleanup:

• Plastic tablecloth (wrap it up and toss it)

• To-go boxes so guests could take cookies home

• Minimal dishes and surfaces to manage

Cleanup took maybe 15 minutes total.

What It Looked Like in Real Life

People started arriving around 5:15 — some in work clothes, others already in comfies. We opened a bottle of wine, chatted, and naturally drifted toward cookie decorating. I passed my phone around for DoorDash orders while frosting chaos unfolded.

We shared stories, laughed at our decorating skills (or lack thereof), and enjoyed being together without an agenda.

By 7:45, the night naturally wound down. Everyone was home by 8:00.

And it was wonderful.

A JoyBuilt Friends’ Holiday Gathering isn’t about doing more. It’s about making it easier — and more meaningful — to be together.

If this season feels loud, let your gatherings be soft.